posted 04-11-2002 07:29 AM PT (US)
Ok here they are:
Septic Tank Truck sign reads: "We're #1 in the #2 business".
Sign over a gynecologist's office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
At a military hospital-door to endoscopies: "To expedite your visit
please "back in"
On a Plumbers truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."
On the trucks of a local plumbing company "Don't sleep with a drip.
Call your plumber."
At a tire shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout."
Door of a plastic surgeon's office: "Hello. Can we pick your nose?"
At a laundry shop: "How about we refund your money, send you a new one at no charge, close the store and have the manager shot. Would that be satisfactory?"
At a towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
On an electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts."
In a non-smoking area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push."
At an optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
On a taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff."
In a podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."
On a fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."
At a car dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
Outside a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."
In a veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait.
At a propane filling station, "Tank heaven for little grills."
And don't forget the sign at a Chicago radiator shop: "Best place in town to take a leak."